It's unrealistic, of course, to aspire to a complete personality overhaul, but what we can do is examine old patterns, learn to be aware of how they're affecting our relationships and begin to alter them.
When a person comes to me for therapy after a breakup or divorce, especially if the relationship was challenging, one of our tasks is to explore the dynamics of not only the relationship in question, but all other significant relationships in the person's life as well--all the way back to parents or other primary caregivers.
The dynamics of those relationships offer clues as to why we repeat the same behaviors again and again in our interactions with others.
The widespread belief is that these patterns are largely unconscious, operating in areas of our brains that are not always connected to our awareness.
Fast forward a decade filled with a great deal of introspection and inquiry into psychology, self-discovery and personality, and I would have had to agree with her.Understanding Her Passive-Aggressive Behavior Passive-aggressive behavior at its heart is the display of poor communication skills: a person feels frustration but is unable to express those emotions clearly and openly, so their expression sputters out in maladaptive ways.Ironically there is a strong desire in a passive-aggressive person to become closer to their partner by discussing what bothers them, but instead their behavior tends to drive them away, further adding fuel to the fires of frustration.Revenge, retaliation, recalibration of emotions; but it doesn’t work because the true target, the painful rupture in the relationship, remains closeted.Have you ever felt that certain patterns keep popping up in your relationships with significant others, family, friends, bosses or coworkers and wondered why?More so, I never wanted to be seen as anything other than human, divine, and loving.